I was an island before you came along,
Put your boat in my sand, your hand in my hand,
Your heart in my songs.

I was a fighter, and I was so brave.
But I lowered my sword when you held me and swore
You'd stay, stay, stay oh

I can't do this alone anymore
'Cause I'm no good on my own anymore
What did I do to deserve this?
What did you do to me?
Baby, come back.
You know I don't want to be free.

I was a rebel, but I had a cause,
'Til you came to town, pushed me around,
And showed me what love was

I was a wolf, dear, apart from the pack
But you answered my cries in the dead of the night
And told me tha tyou had my back, oh

I can't do this alone anymore
'Cause I'm no good on my own anymore
What did I do to deserve this?
What did you do to me?
Baby, come back.
You know I don't want to be free.

Waiting for something
But I don't know what I want
Searching for reasons, yeah
Reasons to carry on
Wake up and shake off sleep
'Cause there's work to do today
I need time, I need direction
I need something to say.

I got my fingers crossed
And my hopes are high
So I'll try to stay calm
Try to stay dry

Jumpin' from place to place
With a plan so out of range
Nothing I can to to save me
And nothing I can change.

I got my fingers crossed
And my hopes are high
So I'll try to stay calm
Try to stay dry

I got my fingers crossed
And my hopes are high
So I'll try to stay calm
Try to stay dry

Try to stay dry
I don't know why
I let you into my life
Into my heart
Into my bones
Into my mind
I don't know why
I let you into my life
Into my heart
Into my bones
Into my mind.

I got my fingers crossed
And my hopes are high
So I'll try to stay calm
Try to stay dry

I don't know why
I'm afraid to fly
Back to my home
Where I know I'll be alright

I never could quite say
How you made me feel
The way you always did
But kid, I'd never treat you right

And I don't know where you are
And although I've come so far
I can't say that life without you isn't hard
And I don't know where to go
Please don't say "I told you so"
When I tell you I still miss you in the dark

I guess I'll always miss you in the dark.

I'll say goodbye
To the memories
And the lies I always told
I'm getting older every day

If I could, I'd take it back
But the past is just the past
With you and me,
It doesn't matter what I say

And I don't know where you are
And although I've come so far
I can't say that life without you isn't hard
And I don't know where to go
Please don't say "I told you so"
When I tell you I still miss you in the dark

I guess I'll always miss you...

In the dark
We were all we'd ever be
I was you and you were me
Crashing deeper to the bottom of the sea
Where we still lie
And if I fall out of the sky
I won't dare to wonder why
'Cause baby, I deserve to die.

I woke up at seven
Rode the bus until eleven
Called ex-lovers, and my brother
Hoping someone was awake
Circled around the campus
In a t-shirt and pajamas
As I stared out the window
And my heart began to break

But it's all good,
'Cause I'm no good
And believe me,
You don't need me.
It's a big world,
And I'm old news to you.

I started healing
Soon as I regained the feeling
In my fingers pressed so hard
Against that steel the night before
I wrote another love song
But my heart, it wouldn't sing along
My head agreed, I didn't need
To try and right the wrongs

But it's all good,
'Cause I'm no good
And believe me,
You don't need me.
It's a big world,
And I'm old news to you.

I woke up at seven
Rode the bust until eleven
Called ex-lovers, and my brother,
Hoping someone was awake

There's wine on my shoes from the time that I spilled it
That morning I knew that you were the one
You made me believe that things could be different
To my disbelief, the damage was done
The stain, it won't come out
And now when I look down
I see you. I see you.

This bottle of liquor I left in my kitchen
Was finished the night I was finished with us
I kept it around, although it was empty
So empty like you. So empty because
We drank that bottle dry
I cried, I cried, I cried
For you. For you.

Remember the last time I saw you? I loved you.
But we were so drunk we were practically dead.
And I can't remember the things that we did
But man, I remember the things that we said.
You were not the same without me.
I was not the same with you.
With you.

No no no
Please don't don't don't
I can't can't can't
I won't won't wont
You will let me down
You will let me down
No no no
Please don't don't don't
I can't can't can't
I won't won't wont
You will let me down
You will let me down like you do.

Well I'm sitting here in silence
and I'm feeling so discouraged.
'Cause I only want to call you,
but I just don't have the courage.

And it seems like only yesterday,
things were going fine.
It's funny how our lives can change
in only seconds time.

And I know I'll miss the bad jokes,
and the way you never called.
I know I'll miss the way your TV glowed blue on the wall
as we lay there in the darkness.
Try to understand it all.
Understand it all.
Couldn't understand at all.

I'm sorry that I never could
quite say this to your face.
Always hiding behind melody lines,
hooks that keep me safe.

And I know this may be catchy
but I know you can't relate,
so what's possible's impossible,
and that I won't debate.

But I know I'll miss the bad jokes,
and the way you never called.
I know I'll miss the way your TV glowed blue on the wall
as we lay there in the darkness.
Try to understand it all.
Understand it all.
Couldn't understand at all.

So don't take this the wrong way.
This is nothing like the past.
I'm fine and I am okay
with the fact that this won't last.
And I'll try to fix my problem,
sorry I was so afraid
of what could've been,
what should've been,
oh what a mess I've made...

'Cause I know I'll miss the bad jokes,
and the way you never called.
I know I'll miss the way your TV glowed blue on the wall
as we lay there in the darkness.
Try to understand it all.
Understand it all.
Couldn't understand at all.

I’m not a mystery, everything I think is written down
Keeping me from keeping you around
I can’t keep my feet on the ground
And there’s a million ways that I could mess it up, I always do
By making plans and making them too soon
I can’t make much sense out of you

[Chorus]
But why bother?
‘Cause I’d rather call it off than wait for it to work
And why bother?
‘Cause I bet you’re better off with some other hopeless jerk
And I like you, but what can I do?
There’s too much space to make you stay

And there’s a price to pay for doing what I do, but I can’t stop
I open up my heart like it’s my job
I tell myself it’s over, but it’s not
I’ve got a running list of all the times I tried to break my fall
And all the times I wished that you would call
And all the times I wished for you at all

[Chorus]

I've got a feeling
I know it all too well
I'm getting even
And I'm going straight to hell
For all the thoughts that I'm thinking
I think I'll stick around
I found a ship to sink
And you're going down, down down

I've got a feeling
I think I need your touch-
-me if you feel it
Oh god it hurts so much
To be the bearer of bad news
We barely left the ground
I know you did what you had to
But you're going down, down, down

So lie your way out of this one again
Cry? I think I won't this time.
I'll take you for all that you are.

All that you are
All that you are
A fading scar
Won't leave a mark

I'm off the deep end
Still swimming fast and hard
Against your current
But my current state
Won't get me far
I'll keep you closer now
You bring me down
But I don't care
Don't bother lookin for me
You won't find me anywhere
You won't find me anywhere
You won't find me anywhere

I've got a feeling
I know it all too well
I'm getting even
And I'm going straight to hell
For all the thoughts that I'm thinking
I think I'll stick around
I found a ship to sink
And you're going down, down down

I slept on the futon and listened to sounds in the silence
I left when the day broke and walked through the city alone
I looked for a towel, forgot mine when I left Virginia
The snow in my boots was much warmer than you
And I just wanted to go home
Go home
Home

Through layers and layers of blankets, I felt my heart beating
We left in the afternoon, headed down I-95
Directions in notebooks and ice on the roads slowed our progress
Got lost in New York, but the view from the bridge,
It was beautiful that night
All those lights
Those lights

A couple hotel rooms and coffee shops later, I found you
Telling your secrets and ghost stories soft in the dark
When you fell asleep, quiet in the backseat, I remembered why I loved you
And my brother drove on while I wrote you a song in my mind
It wasn't the first time
It wasn't the first time

Well I never took a shortcut out
I don't know about you
And looking back is so damn hard
But I still manage to
And I'm quick to call you over
When I'd rather call you mine
So I'll meet you in the middle
I just a little time

These days are keeping me up at night
No way you're taking me down
Let's stay awake through the morning light
Let's leave this town

And you keep me for the lonely days
I swear to God it's true
I can't blame you 'cause I've done the same thing
Many times to you
There's a truth that we cannot deny
'Cause fate don't lie, my friend
You're the reason for my rise, my fall,
My beginning, and my end.

These days are keeping me up at night
No way you're taking me down
Let's stay awake through the morning light
Let's leave this town

This morning I saw your face
No warning, and then erased
I’d recognize you anywhere
It’s no surprise you disappeared on me

Your demons, they came and went
Your heavy heart stayed permanent
I reached for you, but you let go
I left you in the undertow

We were young, love
We were young, love
We were young, love
We were young, love

We were young love
Baby, we were young love
We were young love
Baby, we were young love
We were young love
Baby, we were young love
We were young love
Baby, we were young love

We were young, love
Baby, we were young love
We were young, love
Baby, we were young love
We were young, love

We were young, love
We were young, love

Keep having dreams where I just scream and no one hears me
I just swear and I just shake until I can't breathe
Wake up hot and wet and sweating through the top sheet
Wake up weary-eyed and terrified again

My indecision over who I can or will be
Is just so all-encompassing that it might kill me
And if you rearrange the puzzle, man I'm still me
You know who I am is who I've always been

Back on my bullshit
Panicked, pacing
Wasting my time

I've been
Wandering these alleyways
Trying to find a place to call my home
I've been
Humming all these melodies
Trying to find a voice to call my own
These bad dreams
They break me down but I get up
'Cause I'm still holding out for good luck

So as I wrestle out the words to say what I need
I reminisce on all the years it took to find me
What my soul has tried my whole life to remind me
That who I am is who I've always been

Back on my old shit
Honest, asking
Where is my mind?

I've been
Wandering these alleyways
Trying to find a place to call my home
I've been
Humming all these melodies
Trying to find a voice to call my own
These bad dreams
They break me down but I get up
'Cause I'm still holding out for good luck

Good luck
Good luck
Good luck
Good luck

Lately when I wake up
all the numbers on my clock are new to me
I gotta get more sleep
Stay up late nights
wasting my time
Planning out how
I can make you see
Just what you really need

A stomach full of worry never got me very far
I'll drive out my frustration in this godforsaken car
Somewhere deep inside of me
I know that you were part of the problem
But I still want you
No
Don't go

I know it's not healthy but
I'm kind of getting used to being sick
They don't make cures for this
I'll always be your backup plan
Silver medal, though I ran
The hardest and the farthest of them all

A stomach full of worry never got me very far
I'll drive out my frustration in this godforsaken car
Somewhere deep inside of me
I know that you were part of the problem
But I still want you
No
Don't go

And I can always count on you to count me out
Another broken heart that I could do without
I know I'll never be the one that you adore
So I'll turn around
And stand my ground
And settle down
And settle for

A stomach full of worry never got me very far
I'll drive out my frustration in this godforsaken car
Somewhere deep inside of me
I know that you were part of the problem
But I still want you
So
Don't go
Don't go
Don't go

I forgot what it felt like
to feel so alive
I'm packing my suitcase
and changing my mind
I forgot what it's like to look
the things you want
right between the eyes
It's never been so hard to say goodbye

I'm back to the basics
and waiting for signs
I'm praying for patience
and falling behind
It's not the way I meant to be
it’s just how I'm designed
I get so tired of running out of time

I'm missing out on all the places I could go
The people I could know,
the nights so not alone
We'll never make it
and it wasn't meant to be
But I’ll wait if you'll wait for me

I'm trying to remember
your face in my hands
I wanted adventure,
you met my demands
I told myself the day I left
I want it but I can't
I fell for something far away again

I guess that it's pointless,
but I mean what I say
I never expected
through all of this time
that I could be okay
Yeah, all the things you do to me,
the promise and the pain
I wish with all my heart that I could stay

I'm missing out on all the places I could go
The people I could know,
the nights so not alone
We'll never make it
and it wasn't meant to be
But I’ll wait if you'll wait for me

I forgot what it felt like
to feel so alive
I'm packing my suitcase
and changing my mind
I forgot what it's like to look the things you want
right between the eyes
And say goodbye
goodbye
goodbye
goodbye

I'm missing out on all the places I could go
The people I could know,
the nights so not alone
We'll never make it
and it wasn't meant to be
But I’ll wait if you'll wait for me
I’ll wait if you'll wait for me

A ten-year celebration of the 2009 album '...Was Right All Along', this collection is live in-studio recording of John-Allison Weiss's 2019 fall tour solo set.

released December 6, 2019

Recorded, mixed, and mastered by Peter Recine in Los Angeles, CA. Guitar and vocals by John-Allison Weiss. All songs written by John-Allison Weiss. Cover photo by Mo Doron.